the piece of clothing that never comes off
i've long figured out that people are attracted to someone who's confident. not someone with delusions of grandeur, but someone who knows herself and isn't afraid to be that person, no matter what.
confidence is simply the difference between a beautiful girl with head-case insecurities and an ugly girl who carries herself like a queen. i happen to think i'm beautiful, both inside and out, and i'm not gonna let you think otherwise.
like i have this co-worker i'll call "tanya" who is thoughtful and gorgeous, but she doesn't consider herself attractive. tanya has a rocky marriage with a no-good husband, and that has chipped away at her self-esteem. she's a petite size 10, but feels she's overweight. she has thick, pretty hair, but thinks it's atrociously groomed with split ends. her body is banging (especially that booty), but she doesn't see herself as "fine."
one day tanya and i were having a conversation where she was complaining about her body. i told her i would kill to have her body, seeing as how the last time i wore a size 10, our current president's daddy was in office.
"girl, please," tanya countered. "i would rather have your body. you're big, but at least your body is toned; you're solid. you don't have this cellulite i have."
"toned where? i'm fat, honey," i argue.
"yeah, but you carry it well. and you don't have a problem with your size."
then tanya admits that marital discord and plain old neglect has battered her perception of herself. she says she's not as confident as she used to be. she's not beautiful; she's fat. and this is despite men telling her how good she looks. in her mind, she doesn't believe it.
that's not the view i have of myself. sure, i have those days, as everyone does, where i feel a little plain, a little ugly, but it's something that passes. i touch up my hair or put on some makeup or put on a cuter outfit the next day, and keep on stepping.
but confidence is the final accessory i add to my outfit, the one piece that i keep on--and never take off.
posted by Brains Nbooty @ 7:48 PM
3 Comments
3 Comments:
this is an insightful and thought-provoking post, sista. i wish i could keep my cloak of confidence on all the time. i try to keep it close though...maybe in my purse...
i look forward to reading more of your posts! btw, thanks for the props on my blog. it was tough to write it, but i feel better for it.
thanks nikki. i plan to add you to my regular blog surfing, too.
@sabledawn...i think there may be some domestic abuse going on with them, but it's more mental than anything. what's going on, from what i can tell, is that he cheats on her and she internalizes that as not being good enough. like she described to me one of the women he cheated on her with as being a beautiful, voluptuous younger woman. that wrecked her self-esteem as she didn't think she measured up. and then she still married him. go figure.
okay, now let me stop spillin my co-worker's business...lol
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