whodini might be on to something....

i'm gonna take you back...way back.

remember whodini's hit song "friends"? yeah you know it. sing it in your head or out loud. now i don't wanna see nobody grinding their ass doing the snake. (damn, just thinking about that dance makes me feel old).

but it goes a little something like this:

"friends...
how many of us have them?
friends...
the ones we can depend on."

it made me think about who's really down with me. my father, old sage he is, always told me you never have as many friends as you think. he says, and he almost hurt my feelings explaining this years ago, is that you really only have as many friends as you have fingers on one hand. not to be cruel, but it goes that your "true friends," are the ones who will ride or die with you. they'll loan you money (and not begrudgingly), take care of you, always be there and will do anything for you without hesitancy. not crazy shit, but their loyalty will never be doubted.

now i truly understand what he meant. (damn, i hate it when he's right...it just gives him more ammunition...)

these days, friends like that rare. people treat relationships like kleenex, and half the time you'll be using one to dry up your tears from the betrayal. take for example my former roommate. we moved out of our apartment about three years ago, and it's been almost that long since we've talked. this is the girl i used to share my love life and wild thoughts with (and vice versa), and she would always be on the same page with me. i was there when her father passed away barely a month after we had signed our lease. we used to stay up nights talking about all the things we wanted out of life.

then we moved out of our apartment one summer two years later. and things just weren't the same. we saw each other few more times. went to some clubs. hit walmart, our regular joint we practically lived in. we began school that fall and lost touch...or should i say she lost touch with me. i would call, she wouldn't answer or call me back days later.

and to this day, i still don't know why. we have mutual friends who ask me where she is cause even they haven't seen her in a hot minute, and because at the time, we had appeared so close.

i thought we did, too.